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Hilariously sad stories about modern dating
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Boo Thangs

A lot has happened since the last time I wrote and I don't even know where to begin. I'm not really worried about defining the relationship anymore. It's just a label right? Especially because since Halloween weekend, he wants to see me all the time, calls me baby, and brags about me to all his friends. I'm not complaining! He also wants me to meet his family over the holidays which is really freaking me out. (We're from the same city which is very convenient). If I meet his family, that means I should introduce him to mine. They already know about me, but I don't really talk to my family about that stuff. Plus, it'd be hard to explain since he's not actually my boyfriend. We're "boo things." He started calling me that which I think is hilarious since that's what I referred to him as when talking to my friends. I don't really know what the difference is between what we are know and if we were "boyfriend and girlfriend," and I'm kind of relieved because if we were official then I'd have to seriously think about where this is going in the future. We've talked about kids in passing, but let's not forget that he's two and a half years younger than me, so I don't know if we'll want the same things at the same time. I guess only time will tell...

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Still more D2 drama. I ended up going on an accidental date last weekend. I met my dad's colleage's son who just moved to LA. Seemed friendly enough. I actually had a pretty good time and he ended up asking me out to dinner that night. Well, I kind of have plans. D2 was sick and I was going to bring him donuts (he didn't want soup). I almost felt like that would be too much of a girlfriend move, but two of my friends assured me it was a good idea. Besides, he only gets that kind of treatment when he's sick. So when I was taking care of D2, I slipped in a comment about my date just to see how he'd react. He said he wasn't jealous (because no one likes a jealous person) and that if I wanted to see this guy again I should. Well, not exactly the answer I was hoping for. My friends are divided. Some think I should cut and run and some think he was trying to play it cool. At the time, it didn't bother me, but after I left, and the night went on, I started to get more and more upset. But he's still been texting me and apparently telling his friends about me. I'm not sure exactly what he's saying, but that's a good thing, right? He also asked me to dinner tonight, but I have plans, so things seem to still be on track. Albeit very very slowly since we started talking back in June! All that matters is that he keeps on coming around. I don't think he'd stick around this long if he weren't actually interested. 

Now, what to do next? My friends are still divided. Some say keep playing it cool (I'm really good at hiding the crazy), and some say I gotta put it on the line and define the relationship. Having "the talk" is all about timing. I don't want to push him away if he's not ready yet. And yes, I firmly believe that he could be more ready over time. The longer we keep spending time together without putting too much pressure on it, the more time he has to fall desperately in love with me. (See? I told you I was crazy)

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I was feeling a vibe

We're back on. I'm getting tired of this on and off stuff with D2, but I just can't keep myself away. Last night, we went out with the same friends that we're trying to keep this from. Well, we're not very good at hiding it I guess because in front of everyone, one of our friends asked us if we were dating. "No." Oh, he was just "feeling a vibe." A little awkward in front of everyone, but it's fine. We've been asked and denied it before. However, once D2 and I were alone, he brought it up three times. Ya, it was so weird that he brought that up in front of everyone, but you don't need to keep saying it like it's the most ridiculous idea you've ever heard. I suppose it's time to have "the talk," but I obviously can't bring it up for fear of scaring him off. Don't you hate how crazy they make us?

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Totally Lost

D2 is all over the place and I have no idea what's going on. We didn't see each other for about two weeks after his grandmother passed away. Totally understandable. Then we saw each other last Monday, Thursday and had a date on Sunday. Awesome. Monday he didn't text me all day and then I ran in to him out for our friend's birthday (even though he said he wouldn't be there). He walked me to my car at the end of the night and told me about his super awkward day. He was drunk and kind of hard to follow but this is what I think he was saying. He agreed to go on a date (maybe a set up) but then made it awkward by telling her that he's seeing me (that's a good thing, right?). I asked him if I should be jealous and he said no (also a good thing, right?). He then apologized for being drunk and said he'd tell me about it later. 

He also asked me how another one of our friends knows about us (is there an us?). I have no idea. I've been trying super hard not to tell anyone. He's the one that's' been making it super obvious when we're around our friends. So far on my count, at least six people know. Two are my roommate and his best friend so I guess those get a free pass, but the others I had nothing to do with. It's stressing me out because I still don't know what's going on between us and I don't need other people talking about it or worse, asking me about it. Plus, it seems to be spreading like wildfire...great. 

He texted me that night after I had left about going out again and apologized for being a "lame duck." I said Saturday and asked him why he was a lame duck. Six hours later he said "country dance lessons?" "Is that why you're a lame duck?" Then nothing. What? Am I freaking out about nothing? What is going onnnnn?!

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Add another one to the pile

A guy friend of mine texted me earlier asking if I had "a few minutes to chat." Uh oh, the last time I heard that, this happened. Maybe I was just being crazy and jumping to conclusions. I've been friends with him for years. He was a previous teacher of mine (does that make this creepier?) and has been with his girlfriend since I've known him. They even live together!

Well, I wasn't being crazy or jumping to conclusions. I believe the exact words out of his mouth were "I need to know if I'm living in a fantasy thinking that we could be more than friends." Wow. I told him how much I loved him as a friend and tried to let him down easy. Even though I had an inkling he would say something like that, part of me still didn't think it would happen in a million years.

The best/worst part about all of this is that his girlfriend knows he has feelings for me. They've been going through a rough patch and are doing couples counseling in an effort to work things out. I guess being completely honest with each other is one of the new things they're working on so he told her that he has feelings for someone else. She immediately asked if it was me. Yikes. He also told me that he wouldn't be able to come to my birthday party (in two weeks) because he didn't feel right about bringing his girlfriend to the party of a girl she knows he's attracted to. No shit. He then told me that last year was different because I had a boyfriend at the time. Last year?! Whatever. I still can't get over this girlfriend thing. So if I had said yes, he would have dumped her, but since I said no, he's still going to keep her around? Ugh. Gross.

Here he is with said girlfriend on their trip to Europe where he didn't propose.

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My Final Answer

Alright. In spite of my better efforts, I'm choosing D2. Well, I knew I liked him better all along, but I was trying to convince myself to go with the more "responsible choice." It was definitely all over for me last Tuesday. D2 and I went on what I guess was our first official date. We've hung out before, but this time he asked me if I wanted to get dinner, he drove, he paid, etc. Afterwards, we ended up watching a movie in bed, (Stupid, I know, but can we acknowledge the fact that it's been two months and I still haven't slept with either of these guys who are both really really hot? Ok thanks.) and I literally said to myself "Oh shit. I really like this guy. I'm totally fucked."

So that's that, and now I'm turning all crazy girl about it which I hate. I didn't hear from him at all after our date, but he had told me that his grandmother was in the hospital and he'd probably be going home soon. Friday he texted me that he was driving home the next morning for what I assume is his grandmother's funeral. He has other things going on so I'm sure texting me is the last thing on his mind. I'm fine with it. He needs to spend the time with his family, and hopefully I'll see him when he gets back. I just have no idea when that is. It was nice that he checked in with me so I knew he'd be gone. That's a boyfriend move right? During our date he also joked around saying "I'm not sure if this relationship is going to work" when I told him I didn't like watching football. Well, at least I hope it was a joke. I didn't realize we were in a relationship, and I feel like him even using the word "relationship" is a good sign. I'm also trying my hardest not to get swept away. He's two and a half years younger than me. I know, age shouldn't matter, but I just have the feeling that settling down isn't on his radar quite yet.

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Two Timer

So...I guess I'm dating two guys at the same time. D2 is back and I'm still seeing E. I know it's not that crazy, but I've never really done this before and I'm starting to get stressed out. Sure, I've been on maybe one or two dates with different guys at the same time, but I think I'm actually dating both of them now. I also really like both of them, so I don't know what to do about it. Even though they're so different, I'm starting to get certain things confused like stories they've told and other small details. They probably both think I have the memory of a goldfish because I'm always asking "did I tell you about this?" or "have we talked about that?" I don't know...wish me luck!

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Let the Games Begin

I had my second date with P last Thursday. It was ok. I'm not too interested in seeing him again. The only problem is that after our first date, he already planned two dates so we're supposed to see a movie next Saturday. So what do I do? Do I cancel the date? Give it another chance? Well, judge me all you, but I decided to do a little experiment. I'm going to turn on the crazy and see how long he sticks around. It's my own little "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days." If you think about it, I'm really letting him down easy because he'll think it's his decision to end things. 

I all went down on Saturday, starting with a seemingly normal text "Hi. How are you." He responded pretty quickly so I fired back with "I didn't hear from you yesterday so I was starting to get worried."  i'll just recreate the entire conversation here...(with my thought in parenthesis)
Me: I didn't hear from you yesterday so I was starting to get worried.
Him: Worried? Oh, are we in a relationship now? ;) (Winking face. Good, he's joking around)
Me: Are you asking?
Him: I was having fun, but it's a topic that's been on my mind. Was planning to bring it up next Saturday.
Me: You might as well bring it up now... (Here we go)
Him: Guess so...What are your thoughts on one right now? (Not sure where yjis is going)
Me: It's already been on your mind. Maybe you should go first.
Him: Alright, fair point. I'm looking for one right now. I don't know if it will be short term or long term, serious or casual, doesn't really matter and depends on the other person. I'm simply open to one. You?
Me: Of course I'm open to one. I'm looking for the one. (Still trying to be a little bit crazy. Big mistake)
Him: So am I. So shall we take things to the next level? Because I'd like to move past the dating phase. (What, what?)
Me: What do you mean by next level?
Him: Be a couple. Come over one night this week, we watch a movie, cuddle, have a deep conversation and spend time together in a relaxed setting. (You do realize we've been on two dates, right? Also, thanks for the explanation)
I don't respond
Him: What are your honest thoughts on the situation right now?
I don't respond
Him: Next level includes talkingmore and seeing each other more, doing more things together. Typical relationship stuff. Thought that would be obvious... (Thanks again for the explanation. I obviously haven't responded because I was unclear. Also understanding why you're single in a major way. 
Me: I'm sorry. Honestly I don't see us going in that direction. Hope you understand...
Him: Ha, no worries at all! I wasn't feeling things either. Good luck on your search. (Sure you weren't)

Who in their right mind would act this way after two, TWO dates? I'm pretty sure I was clearly not having a good time on the second one even. Someone is crazy desperate to find a girlfriend. Geez. Even if I had been slightly interested, that conversation would have definitely sent me packing. Maybe he reversed experimented me.

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Double Dater

I had two dates last week! With two different guys! That I met in real life! Sounds crazy right? I didn't know that actually happened anymore. The first is P, who I met at work. He asked me to grab a drink after I got off, but I just wanted to go home so I told him he could ask for my phone number. He took me out for dinner the next day. It was perfectly fine. Not bad, but not great. Just good. I got a text the next day asking for a movie date in two weeks. He then said it was a long ways away (no kidding) and asked me to dinner next Thursday.

All of this would be great and exciting, if not for boy #2, E. I met him at a friend's birthday party last weekend and thought he was cute. There wasn't a whole lot of flirting at the party, so I thought it was a lost cause, but apparently he asked about me! We made a frozen yogurt date for Saturday night. He picked me up (always a good move) and we went to a place nearby. He was flirty from the start, teasing and touching my arm. I had a great time. Afterwards he asked if I wanted to walk around. Since there isn't too much in the area, we decided to take a short drive down to the beach. (I knew what he was up to, but I was totally ok with it). We walked along the beach a little before sitting down to talk. Obviously, one thing lead to another and we ended up kissing. It was pretty romantic. Then, it started raining. Not real rain, but Los Angeles drizzle so we didn't get soaked. I don't think anyone could have written a better date if they tried! It was like the Notebook. Well, not as passionate, but still awesome. Eventually we did our best to get all the sand off and he dropped me back at home. After a little more kissing in the car we said goodnight. Ok, I lied. If I had written this date, we would have made plans for a second one. I was damn sure a second date was a given after our magical night, but I'm starting to have my doubts. I didn't hear from him on Sunday and today I got a lame text conversation about his trip to the dentist. Either he's not that into me anymore, or he's damn good at playing this game. Yes, I know it's only been two days, but like our previous example, I'm used to getting asked on a second date the next day. This is why I hate dating, because this guy is driving me crazy. I thought that maybe I showed my cards too soon. I definitely showed him I was interested. Of course, we didn't go past kissing (he was actually a complete gentleman), but a first date make out might have been a little too soon. When we kissed goodbye in the car, he said something about me leaving him wanting more. I thought he meant that I was leaving him wanting more, but maybe he was telling me that I should leave him wanting more? I don't know. I hate when I get like this. Ugh.

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Giving up on D2. I saw him out last week with who I thought was his ex-girlfriend. I know they dated because Facebook told me, and D2 told me he had just gotten out of a relationship when we first started talking. Maybe they got back together, or maybe they're just friends, but he was still putting his arm around her and being affectionate. Even if they're not in a relationship anymore, it was clear that he still has feelings for her. Plus, they've known each other since they were children. I can't compete with that! I was super awkward the whole night because I had been talking to D2 on Facebook chat until 12:30am the night before. Seriously, I don't get it! Oh well, on to the next one. 

PS. There is a next one ;)

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